Hot Pocket

Jim Gaffigan has a new comedy special available for download on his website for 5 smackaroos.  No middle man, DRM-free, hallelujah.  He tweeted about it, I immediately went to his site (social media marketing at work, folks), hovered my little mouse over the BUY ME NOW button and then ...

and then ...

I sighed.  Loudly.  Grumbling to myself, "Stupid no unnecessary purchases month", I watched the teaser trailer, making a silent promise to Mr. Gaffigan that I'd be back May 1st to buy his special.  If you are one of the sad, unlucky few who has yet to enjoy the comedy stylings of Jimbo, I highly recommend you start with this:

And now you should go buy his special, because of the funny.  DO IT FOR ME, PEOPLE!  DO IT FOR SAD PEOPLE EVERYWHERE.

*ahem*

If you're curious, the first 12 days (ok, 11 since the 1st of the month was a bit of a bust) of April have gone pretty smoothly.  I'm becoming much more aware of those little $3 and $5 and $200 purchase I make unthinkingly, which is the point of this month's challenge.  Just walk away, Heather ... just walk away.

Heather walks away.

I had a little epiphany today.  See, I have this friend.  (Just one.)  This lady handles her money like, for lack of a better word, "Whoa."  Her middle name should be "I Handle My Money Like Whoa".  Bit of a mouthful though.  (That's what she said.)  We are all envious of her ability to save and maintain a (seemingly) constant awareness of her spending habits.  (We're also envious of her butt.  It's real nice.)

I realized today, while I was definitely not thinking about her butt (did this just get weird?), that she must live like this ALL THE TIME.  Her life is a month of Aprils and it's not even hard.  (That's what she said.)  I certainly find this an admirable quality (one of the many she has) and one I could, perhaps, attempt to emulate. At least a little.  Well, I guess I'm doing that right now, but I mean beyond April.  "To infinity, and beyond!"  Ah, Buzz.

It's a nice idea, but see... I like pens.  A very specific pen.  My go-to, absolute favorite, must-have is the Uni-ball Jetstream Stick Rollerball.

I am magical.  Like a unicorn.

Right now?  I have lost all three I had in my possession.  I am Uni-Ball-less (I feel like I could make a joke about Lance Armstrong here, but I am going to rise above).  I hate writing with any other pens.  I really do.  They feel wrong in my hand, the ink doesn't flow as smoothly, my words come out bad ... they're just horrible.  IT'S WRONG!  ALL WRONG!

But.  Is the purchase of a Uni-ball a necessary item?  No.  No, it's not.  I am surrounded by "perfectly acceptable" pens.

Sigh.

Life is hard.